Bahama Mama's is just around the corner.

Picture 010
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

Greetings from rainy Tampa Bay Florida!!

I'm travelling on business, wearing my green chuck taylors, and have just checked into what can only be described as a sleazy salesman's dream.

That's right folks, corporate lodging. As you can see as illustrated by the pictures, I am in a lovely art-deco suite. However, on this trip I am not alone. A new hire and an intern are accompying me.

As you may well know, I'm not a fan of business travel. In fact, I think it's grody. My day did include a few highlights:

1) I asked the girl at the desk where was a good place to grab some food. "Oh, your in luck, just behind is a 'Bahama - Mama's! I turned around and shielded my eyes from the obtrusive red neon light which screamed "Bahama-Mama's".

"Um, do you know of anything a little less cheesy?"

Crickets chirping.

2) I found my room and opened the door, met with a smell of fresh mildew. Yummy. I immediately noticed a large stain on the couch. No doubt about it, it's semen. I won't be sitting there.

Why is it on airplanes i get squeezed into a seat against a morbidly obese person, yet the row in front me contains three hotties? Life can cruel and unusual at times.

Back To School

So. I've been rather quiet lately. I've been, you know, contemplating life and stuff. So anyway, I've been thinking about going back to school now for a while. My only real dilemma was, "What the hell would I take?" Over the past few years I've developed a jeckyl/hyde syndrome with a constant strife over doing what seems to be the right thing to do vs. doing what I want to do. Up until now jeckyl has been the victor. I've been excercising, saying my prayers, and eating my vitamins, brotha. Hyde's voice gradually grown louder, to the point he can't be ignored. I digress.

I had been checking the college websites and checking out the masters programs.

Here is how my mind operates:

MBA - fat old men with khakis. no.
Any type of engineering - I would prefer a bullet to the scrotum
Advertising - too officey
art - would love to, but what would i do?

Today it hit me. I sat on my office chair and peered out the window. I glanced down at my green chuck taylors and I just knew. It was time to bite the bullet and do the art stuff.

The practical side of me, sensing impeading defeat, quickly formulated a plan. I can't get a masters, since you need a b.a. first. Getting a b.a. means taking some jack-off intro classes first, and I will need to ease into things. I can pick up the intro classes at night at the local community college to get into the groove (And it won't be too much money). During the period I can go into hyper save mode. Then I can transfer to a better school and knock out the rest of the b.a classes. I can prob knock this out in 2 years if i take summer classes. After that, well, we'll see what happens.

Jeckyl and Hyde both agreed and fell into silence.

Rainy Sunday.

ruel with guitar
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

So I stay in and make stuff.

Today I made:

1) Fajitas
2) A mess
3) Laundry clean
4) some paintings.

This is me. Evan walked by when I was taking a picture to use as a reference. He shook his head and said, "Your really gay."

Then i threw a candle at him and hit him in the nuts.

sketchdump 190

sketchdump 190
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

sketchdump 191

sketchdump 191
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

sketchdump 189

sketchdump 189
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

sketchdump 188

sketchdump 188
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

Shew-wee.

What a narrow miss that was. I almost had a collision with the midwest. The men upstairs scheduled me for a training in Louisville Kentucky.

I had it pictured in my mind. Airports, khaki pants, semen infested hotel rooms, and dinner every night at a Chili's. My own personal hell packaged up nicely in the bluegrass state.

The men upstairs called me back and said I didn't have to go. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

sketchdump 187

sketchdump 187
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

Life drawing 1/15. This is pretty damn good, one of the better ones I have done. There's an art show in march where people submit works done in the session I attend.

I have 2 pieces (this one included after some additional work) that I'll put in it. That'll knock out one of my todo goals for the year.

I'm feeling inspired, like Tony Robbins, just not as tall or creepy.

On the way home I heard a kiss song came on that I had never heard before. I'm going to go learn it now. Laterz.

sketchdump 186

sketchdump 186
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

Nightly sketch dump, completed after performing my strict nightly calisthetics routine.

I'm sitting on quite possibly the best true life story I have ever encountered. It's short story worthy, and nothing short of hilarious. Keeping it bottled up is excruciating and I am simply horrible with secrets.

sketchdump 185

sketchdump 185
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

I felt a bit sleepy for the greater portion of the day.

pwnage

Back in the day when I was work traveller, we would torment the dog by saying "Fred, Ruel is going bye-bye" before I left for the week. Eventually, he was trained to the point that when you say this he would run up and start licking me on the face.

We constantly pwn each other at home, and it's a constant battle. Today, I was pwned big time.

Fred was sitting on the floor and his little red wiener was hanging out. We started throwing things at him, so that his red rocket would go away. Instead, he started licking it.

Furiously.

We're both laughing and apalled at the same time, then, E unleashed the ultimate all time pwn.

E: "Fred, Ruel's going bye-bye".

pwned.

sketchdump185

sketchdump185
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

I only had an hour at life drawing class today as I had other things going on. I only got one sketch in, but it turned out alright.

This whole home buying thing is a pain in the ass. First off, I'm lazy. The mortgage lady the bank referred me to (who I never met face to face, this is important for later in the story) asked for all my bank statements, 401k statements, pay stubs, you know the drill... all my records. She wanted me to fax them to her. The thing is, I don't really keep that sort of stuff. I just throw it away.

I waited for a week to get my pay stub, and then set about printing the stuff out. The rest is avaialable online. My goddamn hp printer never works right though. After kicking it 4 times, it began to print, but then the black ink ran out. Off to best buy to get printer cartridge (another day passed).

So I finally get everything together, my next obstacle is the fax. I fax the lady the stuff and then immediately call her to tell her I faxed it. 24 hours pass. Now I am nervous. I've never actually met the lady, and now I am convinced it's a scam and she has stolen my identity. This causes an anxiety attack that is only cured by m&m ice cream cookies.

A few days pass and the lady calls me. Ok, she didn't steal my identity.

"I got your fax, how many pages was it?"

16

"I only got 1"

Splendid. Guess what I did with all the printouts after I faxed them?

Give up?

I threw them away of course. You see, one of my new years resolutions is to keep the truck clean.

Now I have to repeat the whole process.

I am slave to sub par office machinery.

todo-list2006

todo-list2006
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

New year's resolutions, sort of. Mostly, I just like to make lists.

Overheard at my house:

sketchdump 184
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

(E opens freezer)

E: You bought m&m ice cream cookie sandwiches??

R: Yes.

E: Can I have one?

R: Fuck no! Get your own, those are mine.

E: Your a dick. I know you ate my eggos. You owe me.

R: Negative.

(I walk to the living room, here the freezer door open and then shut, E runs across the living room carrying a stolen cookie sandwich, I get up and start the chase)

R: GIVE IT BACK FUCKER!

E: YOU OWE ME!!!!

(he locks himself in the bathroom and eats the cookie sandwich)

R: I hate you.

Picture 050

Picture 050
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

I run on rechargables. These are my last two. I bought a pack not long ago, but the rechargable battery fairy comes into my office at night and steals them.

If he is caught in the act, the punishment will be quick and severe.

Picture 047

Picture 047
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

Fred's feeling dark as of late.

Picture 037

Picture 037
Originally uploaded by ruelloehr.

Everything is officially blocked in. Now it's just detail time.