flex appeal

After approximately 20 hours of travel, I arrived home late last night minus luggage and four pounds of lean body tissue. Whenever I return from a trip, I expect the worst when I opened up the door to my abode. Let me give you the play the by play.

First off, I pull into the driveway immedately noticing the abscence of the jeep. The brother is out on a Saturday night? Something must be amiss. I unlock the door the and step inside. I pause for a moment to let the smell of home surround me. "Hmmm, the stench is not quite so bad. How odd!"

My god, the carpets have been cleaned. The dining room has been cleaned too. Ah, but as I step into the living room my world becomes right again. Flex wheeler must have moved in during my absence. We now have a power cage and a weight bench in the living room.

Later, the brother arrived home.

E: "How was Japan?"

R: "Kind of sucked" "How was work this week?"

E: "Kind of sucked. Fred's been bad. He got dirty paws and a dirty stomach"

R: "I noticed that. There are 454 paw prints on my bed. Let's kick his ass"

F: "Blaugh blaugh blaugh blaugh!"

E: "Fred, we don't speak blaugh-blaugh." "Did you see my power cage?"

R: "Um,yeah. It's rockin."

E: "I'm getting buff."


The last time he bought weights his car was broken down (this was a common theme of our youth). He went to sears on his motorcycle, bought 40 lbs of dumbbells, put them in his back pack and attempted to drive home. Everything was cool until the first left turn and the weight shifted.

I have brilliant idea for a new painting. You know those skill crane machines in stores, the kind where you put in a quarter and manuver the claw above a valuable item? Anyways. I want to do Rockwellian painting of 3 little kids using a skill crane. The kids will be gleeful as the crane has just picked a grandiouse item. My twist, is i want the item to be something fucking horrific. I haven't decided what it will be yet though.