Raoul, the hyper sexual french cowboy.

I like interesting characters.

I met a friend at a local bar last night for drinks. Seated next to him was a skinny cowboy he looked to be about 50 or so, and middle aged skanky looking girl. The skinny cowboy had on too tight black pants, a big cowboy hat, a red cowboy shirt with the sleeves rolled up to mid bicep and looked to retain all of his baby teeth.

Within a few minutes of sitting down the skanky lady asked my name. "Ruel", I replied. "Ruel, this Raoul!" she said as got the attention of the skinny cowboy. The skinny cowboy began speaking with a strong accent. He was very tan and looked somewhat hispanic but the accent threw me. It turns out he was from France. At this point I didn't get many more words in edge wise.

Raoul, the skinny french cowboy began telling me his story. He is a former computer programmer who now is a fence salesman. We conversed a bit about programing and he suddenly leaps up and and starts prancing around. "I was the 1968 olympic bronze medal winner in fencing at the Mexico City games.", he said while showing me his striking position.

This is where the wierdness sets in. Raoul jumps into a 14 minute soliloque about the clitoris. I won't go into gruesome detail here, but it was very detailed and included a physical demonstration with his tounge. He then said something about the number two and dashed off to the bathroom.

"Josh, this is the wierdest bar night I have ever been privy to," I said to my friend. After 10 or 15 minutes passed I said, "I think Raoul is taking a dump in the bar bathroom. He has been in there for a really long time." In fact, he didn't come out for a half an hour and gave no explanation.

Raoul began asking us a series of very personal questions. I retaliated one of the question by giving it back to him. "Raoul, how many girls have you been with?"
"Over two thousand.", he quickly replied. Josh chimed in with, "Ah, the French Wilt Chamberlain." "I am 56 years old and started at 16. Do the math, it works out to 40 or so a year. Thats only about 4 a month. That's very easy."

Raoul left to dance and we departed in silence. "That was too wierd."

Needless to say I looked up olympic results today but could find no mention of the skinny french cowboy.